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The Culture of Comparison

Comparison- 'When you make a comparison, you consider two or more things and discover the differences between them.' (Collins Dictionary)

The act of comparison is something that comes into most of our lives every day. We compare anything and everything, from places and objects to food, but most of the time we use it to compare ourselves with someone else. Whether that is comparing our productivity with someone else's, comparing our image with someone else's, or even comparing the choices we make.

How does this make us feel? 

Insecure, Intimidated, Behind, Negative, Not doing enough, Not good enough. This may not be universal but these are the words that spring to mind for me.

FOMO- Fear of Missing Out. 

This is something that is becoming more and more common, and it stems from comparison. When comparing ourselves and our achievements to someone else's it is usually because they have something in their life that we feel like we should have. It is very common for us to get completely absorbed in the advances other people are making to the point where we forget the progress we are making in our own practice. We then begin to belittle our own achievements, something we feel really proud of, because someone else has done something that we have decided is better, is more worthy of celebrating. 

When training in musical theatre, comparison was a huge hinderance in my progress. As we practiced in front of mirrors all day comparison became unavoidable, whether that was reflecting on how other people were progressing quicker than myself or comparing my body image to others. My confidence was knocked and It meant I didn’t get the most out of each class because I wasn’t fully focused on myself and I was nervous about volunteering to perform in front of my peers. 
.

So why do we do it?

It is human nature (Arthur, 2015). I don't think anybody could say that they have not once in their life compared themselves with someone else. With web 2.0 platforms such as Facebook and Instagram it is almost impossible to avoid it. We scroll through snapshots of peoples seeming 'perfect' lives, their 'perfect ' relationships, 'perfect' holidays, 'perfect' bodies, and we compare it to ourselves. And whilst we pick out everything we don't have, someone else is probably scrolling down our Instagram wishing they had what we have got. 

WHAT IS THE POINT?


Only by removing the ability to compare myself to others did I learn the scale of the negative affects comparison has on our progress. During lockdown I took classes over web 2.0 applications from the comfort of my own space. Being alone in the room meant that I was completely focused on my own learning and my confidence In both singing and dancing improved. I could be more creative because I wasn’t worried about copying others, and I was able to enjoy every achievement that I made without feeling like they were inferior compared with other people’s accomplishments. 
When we realize that we can let go of comparison, we can really invest in ourselves. It gives us the chance to live by our own timelines and not feel the need to keep up with others. It enables us to focus on our own progress, and put all our energy into our own practice. We can appreciate every single achievement, without it feeling overshadowed. Consequently our confidence grows and the need to compare ourselves with others fades. Essentially, the less we compare, the less need we have to compare. 

I'm thinking of integrating this in my essay, potentially as an AOL. Since lockdown I've actually found myself feeling much more confident about my skills as a dancer and most of the time I think this is due to being alone in my living room therefore the ability to compare myself to others has been stripped away. I know it links well into web 2.0, if anyone has any more ideas on how I can relate it to other theories I would love to hear your thoughts. Also would love to hear about your relationships with comparison.

I have attached a very interesting talk on the topic by Bea Arther.


Arthur, B., 2015. The Culture Of Comparison. [video] Available at: <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wm3D1L2V9do> [Accessed 15 March 2021].

Comments

  1. Hello, I loved reading this blog as I can relate to this topic so much. I've always been bad for comparing myself to others and personally found it worse when doing online classes because I was not so much comparing myself but my space, my equipment and therefore my ability to progress. Web 2.0 is amazing but I see others comparing themselves all the time and altering the way they live just to be like someone they've seen. It's such a huge topic with so many areas you could discuss x

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  2. Hi, this is an interesting reflection and great to hear that you've gained something really positive from this weird time. I think in acting there may be less comparisons as there are more obviously varied stories for actors of all skills and appearances. However, in classes where I was less experienced (TV and Dance) I had to actively push out the 'white noise' which is what I describe my internal self doubt monologue!! By deciding not to listen to the critical voice, I was able to focus better on the task at hand and therefore do a (slightly) better job of it! This meant that by the end of the course I was a lot more confident in these areas.
    Hope that may be useful to think on :)
    Sally

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